How's That Zest Tasting?

According to Sidney, very spicy. That is the word he uses to describe a flavor he is unfamiliar with. Yesterday we had a bit of a ruff day with him. He ended up in the corner 3 times, and when he wouldn't stop screaming at the top of his lungs, he got a BIG taste of Zest Soap in his mouth. Sometimes being loud and sassy just doesn't pay.

I had to laugh a little after it was all said and done because he kept saying "the taste is still in my mouth!". I said, "well, I am not sure how long it will take to go away, just eat those oranges and it might help a bit."

Sometimes I feel like the meanest mama on earth, but I just can't let them run me over, you know? I somehow think that the threat of soap in his mouth may just prevent a similar outburst in the future.

The Twins

So, Tyler (Blake's son) comes over almost every weekend to stay with us. Before school started, he was able to come on some weeknights as well, but living in a different school district and city makes it logistically inconvenient. Homework must come first, you know.

Seth and Tyler are exactly 6 months apart in age, and enjoy many of the same pass times. They love calling themselves "brothers" and say that they are "twins". They say they have so much in common it is CREEPY! I am so happy that they get along so well. Sidney does get left out a little because the age gap is so great. He loves Tyler so much and gets very excited every time he arrives to visit. Although it is a big transition and can sometimes be stressful to have such a diverse little family, we are enjoying it very much. Blake is so thrilled to have an active roll in his son's life.

It is amazing to me to find myself in the roll of a "stepmother". Who knew that would happen? What an incredible series of events we have gone through over the past several months.

I Can't Even Help Myself...I Must Look!

I look over my blog entries quite frequently. As I give the link to various facebook friends, I look again to see if anyone has left a comment. I become more sure of myself in writing, yet when I see no comments, the irrational part of my brain says that not many people are reading it. That may well be the case, and even still I love to write my posts and tell my little tales. It has been an interesting experience over the past year, just allowing myself to say what I want and to let my family and friends into my everyday life even though they are far away.

Now we get to obsessive part...you know where it says "view my complete profile"? Well, I look occasionally to see if the number on my profile page has changed to determine if anyone is looking at it. I swear, at least a third of the number is ME looking at my own profile! What is that? I suppose it's because I am really beginning to enjoy it more and I want people to see it, and let me know what they think also. I have sent the link to some of my closest friends, and they say..."Oh yeah, I meant to look at that", or "I did look at it once, and it reads like you talk". For a while, I didn't feel like writing because I didn't feel like it was important or interesting enough for people to read, but after reading some other blogs, I realized that it doesn't really matter at all. Everyone is different and unique. I am pleased with myself just for making the commitment to write on a regular basis. I am loosening up and keeping in mind that just because people don't make comments doesn't mean that they don't read it, and even if only a handful of people do, I am glad that to have them in my little world. So thank you!

Obsess much, ya think?

This Is The End...

I received something in the mail today that I have been expecting for about a month. Just a small envelope (preceded by a larger one full of documents) containing a single page. My marriage, which was solemnized on the 10th day of August, was dissolved by a judgment which became effective on the 11th day of October. We were legally married 11 years but have been living apart for the last 3, split for the last 4. I do not take this lightly. Marriage is not a joke. It is one of the most difficult jobs a person will have and it requires so much and will certainly be very trying. It can be so much more when there is respect and understanding. ..

I am very happy to have this piece of paper. It has been a very long time coming, and so much has happened in the last 4 years. We do our best to raise our children in this situation and we are so much happier this way.

Oh! And by the way...Blake is no longer dating a married chick :)

The Power of 10

My big boy Seth is an entire decade old today. He says, "Mom, I am going to be a tween!". Now I am really left wondering how 10 years could possibly have gone that quickly. Being honest, makes me feel a little old. That's ok, though. It is the nature of life. The normal course of action, we just don't feel age come upon us for the most part. You are only as old as you feel, so they say...

Seth had 3 friends stay over on Friday night. I prudently decided to ask their father if Sidney could stay there for the night so that Seth and his friends could have my undivided attention. They don't want to play with him because, he's too little, of course. He ends up crying and with hurt feelings. He came over with Dad and Monica yesterday for pizza and cake, then off to the arcade. A good time was had by all.

I now see before me a big boy...coming closer to the teenage stage with every passing day. All we can do is teach him right from wrong and pray that he makes positive choices with his peers. He is still (as of now) a child that will hug and kiss me goodbye when I drop him off...preferably outside, thank you very much, but I still get them. I know that over this next couple of years he may start to think of me as an embarrassment, but I will enjoy every last ounce of cuddle time until that sad day arrives.

Happy Birthday, Seth! You are a wonderful, intelligent, strong boy who will become a man before I blink twice, it seems. I love you and am always grateful that I was chosen to carry you and raise you.

Giving Thanks

Today I am thankful for many things.

I am thankful for my children. I am grateful that they have no health concerns and that they are able to live happy, active lives.

I am thankful for Blake. I am happy that he understands me so well and is able to make me feel better when I am downhearted. Thankful also that we have chosen a life together.

I am thankful for my family and the support that they offer me as I raise my boys and live my life.

I am thankful for my friends. For their roles in my life and for the love that they share with me.

I am thankful that I am able to live in a house instead of an apartment so that we can enjoy a yard of our own and more than one level inside...even if it is only a rental.

I am thankful that I have had the experiences in life that I have because I feel it makes me a stronger, more capable person.