So Long Mr. Snail

There is a 32 gallon fish tank sitting in the corner of my diningroom. I hadn't quite realized how much I would enjoy watching fish, but it really is nice. My favorite is the snail. I like to look for him because he is sometimes crafty and hides. We tried to find the hiding spot for a while and finally discovered he was just able to drag himself...shell and all into the little castle. He also bobs from the bottom to the top of the tank, or you can catch him all stretched out going for a little walk on the rocks.

Sunday morning when we got up, all that was left of Mr. Snail was his hollow shell. To make matters worse, his pad was stuck to the filter. We are not sure if he got sick and died, then got eaten, or if he just got eaten. I was actually a little dismayed, I must admit! Personally, I think it was the big ugly Pleco. I think he just ate him up...the big meanie!

Rest in Peace, Mr. Snail

The Glasser Lecture

This is a small newspaper article that I wrote during college...

The Glasser Lecture: My Perspective

I had never heard of William Glasser or his Choice Theory before orientation week in September. As Karen Leeuwin told us about it, I felt that it was a highly stimulating theory and that it would be beneficial for me to attend his conference. I was so pleased and enthusiastic when I became aware that I was, indeed, able to attend.

William Glasser is a very intelligent and knowledgeable man. some of his ideas and theories piqued my interest and curiosity, but others made me a little frustrated, even angry. His concept of a "Quality World" was quite interesting. He stated that everyone needs certain elements, such as love and belonging, power, freedom and fun, in order to live a happy and satisfying life. with this, I can agree. If our space in being invaded in a negative manner, our natural tendency is to block it out, or as Dr. Glasser states, "take them out of our 'Quality World'." I have read many books in the self-help department, and I have seen this information presented in one form or another before. On the downside, I find Dr. Glasser to be a very opinionated individual. His beliefs and opinions are so strong that he simply feels that his "Choice Theory" is the only logical solution to many long-standing world problems. In theory, I agree that his ideas would really help, but I feel that without the assistance of teachers, school boards, employers and any individual we come in contact with, it isn't entirely viable.

As for the conference itself, please locate some more comfortable chairs. It is very difficult to concentrate on the subject at hand when our back-ends are falling asleep. All in all, it was not exactly what I had expected. I probably wouldn't recommend it to a friend. Dr William Glasser, as and individual, will definitely not be in my "Quality World".

HEY! WHO MADE THIS BIG MESS?

Me?

Well then I have to clean it up, it's only fair.

Let's get ready for the 10 SECOND TIDY!

Ah, if only all life's messes could be cleaned up so quickly and easily. I was driving in the car this morning, just thinking about the boys and the decisions I have made that effect their lives. I have often thought of writing a little about my own perspective on my divorce but I feel it will be better in parts, rather than one long post.

In my particular situation, the decision to split was mutual. We had both been feeling unhappy for so long that we didn't treat one another kindly. I feel I need to say right now that although some of the events were completely out of my control, I take FULL responsibility for my own actions and words. It is difficult and takes a long time to see things that way because initially it is always easier to say that the other party was the cause of contention (not that I was going around blaming him but...sometimes what we think matters too). I believe that our own personal experiences as we grow (what we see and hear) shape the way we connect and interact with others, particularly in a relationship. When I noticed that the words we spoke were becoming angrier and less compassionate, I knew that if something didn't change, I would not be able to live a happy life with him. I had seen "unhappy" growing up and simply refused to allow my own children to grow up that way. I don't want them to hear negative, disrespectful words. I don't want them to think that it is normal or right to talk that way. Did we do everything we could to make it work? We did all we knew to do. It is too late for regrets and I never had any to begin with, aside from the obvious reasons to remain (children, house, established life).

So what can I do now to improve my life? Think before I speak, be sensitive to the needs of my partner, and SPEAK MY MIND!

My Gay Friend's Wedding

One of my best women friends, Brenda, married her long-time partner Linda in a small ceremony in Halifax this past Friday night. I had the honor of standing next to her and being a witness of the union. The Justice of the Peace gave a lovely service, and the ladies wrote their own vows to one another. When she originally approached me about standing for her, she said it would just be she and Linda, me and another witness. I was a little surprised that she didn't want to include more family and friends, but she just wanted it to be small and then have a party later. I was so pleased when she called 3 weeks ago to say that they had invited their families and a few friends. It really was a very unique and touching night. I have met her parents and siblings many times over the years, so it was wonderful to spend time with them. It was also nice to meet Linda's family, and all their friends. I could clearly see the love and support of each person in attendance.

I thank you, Brenda, for always being such a great friend to me and for allowing me to be a part of your special day. I couldn't be happier for you.

Adrian, Linda, The JP, Brenda and Me

The First Kiss

Mid July Already

Wow! This month is going so quickly. The boys ended up staying a few extra days with Blake and I before going on vacation, so we had an awesome double sleepover and they were here for my birthday as well. Now they are gone for a little over 2 weeks, and we have already begun washing walls and rearranging things. I enjoy that sense of accomplishment around the house. Here are some pictures of the boys having fun in the pool...