When difficult situations arise, Mama Bear jumps out. On occasion it's more like a Mama Lion. I have trouble with change.
Change is good right?
Nope. I still don't like it. In this case though, I had to make some choices purely based on the well being and security of my children. I have the car now and my expenses have increased since I moved here while household income has drastically decreased just recently. It's all good...mama worked it out. The problem is not really change itself, it's the process of getting from point A to B. I get myself all worked up but...something was different this time. I actually had a lot of clarity. I worked out the details as best I could and researched my options with focus and determination.
I feel very blessed to have good people in my life. I received an email last week from a friend of mine. It was only a couple of sentences but I couldn't help but cry. She said "why don't you just put your stuff in storage for a bit and stay at my place? I can stay at my guy's place and you can bring the boys' bunk beds and a couple of dressers. That way you'll have your finances worked out and able to get your new place." I already worked out all the details of the new place. The issue is the loss of the damage deposit here (I have to break my lease-damned if I do, damned if I don't kind of thing) and coming up with another deposit (1/2 a month's rent).
How kind and generous. Really and truly I am grateful. Much like pinkpiddypaws (I would link it if I wasn't being lazy) I have trouble accepting help from others but am happy to give it. I had to think about this one for a couple of days but I feel good about my choice to accept her help.
Today is a good day. I spoke with my brother the genius on the phone for the first time in over a year. I always feel such joy when I talk to him. I also saw my guardian mom (who I haven't seen in a couple of years) on Sunday. We went to get the boys from their father's place and enjoyed a lovely afternoon together. Tomorrow is a new day. Each one gets a little more normal. I have to move at the end of the month so I won't post much. Perhaps I need to call on some sweet guest bloggers? Hmmm?
it's bedtime...
kisses
the princess
6 comments:
Yeah... change scares me sometimes. But I am addicted to it. Is there something wrong with me?
I am so adult ADHD...I don't like change but live to have change...if that even makes sense....hang in there....
hugs
Change can be so hard but I'm glad you found some clarity there and have good friends to help you through. That's something to really be thankful for. Happy Thanksgiving stealthy one.
misstressm~once i get to the actual change I am usually very content. it's getting there that near drives me crazy. nothing wrong with you. it's a good quality.
momof3boys~it does make sense. :) thanks.
dale~i agree 100%. clarity is very nice. i am enjoying this new self awareness i have found.
Glad that you're taking up this challenge with such steely determination. Also if you ever need someone to guest blog you know you can call on me.
You are right...we may have figured out where to go...but it's the getting there that is hardest, because that is the real thing there, the actual moving one thing.
The very nice part here...is you are right, you have everything clear. Wow, you are a very strong woman...and I am so proud of you...
"Nope. I still don't like it. In this case though, I had to make some choices purely based on the well being and security of my children.", they say it's when you are able to think beyond you that you know how much you've grown in wisdom...you are already there! No wonder you get so many gifts of having your kidos....like Seth!
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