Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Like Being Hit By a Mac Truck

That's just how I feel. Beaten and Broken.
All I do is think, think, think. It's difficult to shut it off.
Will I see him next week? Is it all over?
Am I prepared to deal?
I am so sad my heart aches.
I know I can deal. I have proven it time and time again.
I will be sad but I will be ok. My children will as well. Either way.
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When I got back from lunch today there was a beautiful bouquet of yellow roses in a vase sitting on my desk...next to it a card.
As you can probably imagine, my mind was reeling!
Could these be from him? We did speak last night.
With shaking hands I opened the card.
My sweet, loving cousin stopped by to bring by a card and flowers to say she was thinking of me. Do you know I haven't even spoken with her at all since this went down? She reads my blog and is on my facebook and just wanted me to know she loved me.
I am kind of glad I wasn't there when she arrived because I don't think I would have been able to keep from crying...not just the streaming tears and sniffling kind either. Nope! The real gushy loud cries that express how I feel right now.
I called her to say thanks.
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I have such special friends and family in my life. Although sometimes I feel all alone because they aren't all close by, I truly value each member of my family and the unique relationships that we share. I am so grateful to have my wonderful, loving, understanding and accepting friends.
I thank all my blogger friends as well. Sometimes it feels good to express myself here to a completely non-biased group of people. Thank you for your good thoughts.
I am managing my days and doing ok. Next week will be tricky because I will be all alone. I have to learn to get used to it.
I have to...
Suck it up, Princess!!!!!!!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hang in there!

sid said...

Your cousin is so sweet.

PinkPiddyPaws said...

**hugs***
You can do it. You are strong, smart and sexy. A perfect catch for the perfect person!

the princess said...

suze~i'm hangin', that's for sure!

sid~she is very sweet. i am lucky to have her.

pinkpiddypaws~i know i can do it, just trying to see through the storm is all. it'll get better in time.